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I didn’t know the word Transgender until I was in my 20’s. I actually learned the word when I was being introduced to a Trans man. A Trans man who would tell me I wasn’t Trans, I was just a butch who wanted bigger muscles. The problem was I had never felt attached, loyal, or proud to be a lesbian. I felt neutral to the term and didn’t understand why Pride was such a big thing. I would feel confused when the women of my past said “You’re like a boyfriend, but not” because in my head, I was a boyfriend, but they were right, to them, I wasn’t. It felt messy and complicated.

But when I learned the word Transgender, I felt peace inside. Like my brain finally found the right language and I was finally holding the instruction manual. I felt less alone. My gender no longer felt like a mystery, it felt clear.

For a moment.

And then reality hits you. You think about how it will make you different from others when they find out your Trans, will your family still love you? Will you ever get married? Will I be excluded?

Will I be alone forever?

This Narrated Blog Episode dives into my journey of understanding my identity as a Trans Man.

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Let's dive into the M of the SWIM Method, managing our stress.

Today were going to talk about why taking a deep breath helps with not just calming down but finding our courage.

We forget that we all have that little child in us who has a fear and doesn’t want to be rushed through it or left alone to just sit in it. We want to be guided through it. To have a deep breath to anchor us back into the stability of bravery. But sometimes, well oftentimes, we don’t have another adult to remind us to take that deep breath. We are the adult. Which means we have to build habits that keep us breathing deep through our deep emotions.

We have to practice the habits when we’re calm and create the muscle memory so when we fall, which is inevitable, and all of a sudden we’re seven again, crying on the bathroom floor afraid of how the bandaid will feel, we remember to take a deep breath, let go of the fear, and find our courage.

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Ever wondered why you sometimes prioritize everyone else over yourself, only to feel drained and disconnected? Join me, James Barnes, as we uncover the steps to mend your self-relationship and reclaim your joy. We’ll explore why prioritizing others can erode self-trust and lead to people-pleasing behaviors that make you lose sight of who you truly are. By recognizing and addressing these patterns, you can rebuild this vital connection and embrace a joyful, confident life.

We’ll also dive deep into the role of core values in strengthening self-trust. Discover how aligning your commitments with your true values rather than societal pressures can lead to meaningful self-improvement. Learn practical steps to manage stress through your core values, whether you're tackling tough conversations or facing social situations. By the end of this episode, you’ll have actionable strategies to prove your loyalty to yourself and foster deeper self-love, ultimately enhancing your relationships with others. Don’t miss this insightful journey toward a more authentic and fulfilled you.

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