Remember what a dial tone sounds like? How 'bout a busy signal? Those classic sounds from the 80s seem to be long gone, and it all started with call waiting. Remember that?! Texting has become my excuse for not picking up the phone and making a call—using my voice. These days I’ll think, “they’re probably busy. I don’t wanna bother them.” But that’s just another excuse to not connect with people.

Have you considered that as much as it helps you to pick up the phone and reach out to someone, you are helping that someone as well? Just the act of making the call, even if the person doesn’t answer, is a fantastic way of breaking a negative thought cycle and getting out of self. When they answer, you may have broken a negative thought cycle for them.

My self-talk is pretty loud when it says, “I don’t wanna.” It’s hard to ignore it and do the next right thing for myself. I get what I need when and where I need it when I remain willing to keep the channels of communication open and remain willing to depend on that which is outside of me. Self-sufficiency, to me, means less connection with others, and that can be dangerous for this alcoholic.

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