Episodes

  • Episode 60 – Poop In My Periphery

    Episode 60 – Poop In My Periphery
    Oct 15 2024
    "You gotta keep 'em separated"

    - Ben gets judged for using bar soap.
    - Nobody is left without toilet paper in the work bathroom.
    - Ben previews the videogame Squat Ops.
    - We get asked a direct question and immediately go blank.
    - Ben gives Nobody a lesson in urinal etiquette.
    - Nobody discovers her views on bathroom windows are not shared by those around her.
    - We’re conflicted about the appropriate way to appreciate a sexy dance routine.
    - We discuss the perils of answering a phone call in an echoey room.
    - Nobody had the best weekend of her life at PAX and is still chasing that high.
    - Lana Del Rey married an alligator tour guide and Ben feels mislead.
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    1 hr and 21 mins
  • Episode 59 - The Cheese Is On Fire

    Episode 59 - The Cheese Is On Fire
    Sep 24 2024
    "I lost my poor meatball when somebody sneezed"

    - Ben is perplexed by the settings on his dryer.
    - We still haven’t forgiven our friend Alex for shooting an unarmed man in the head, fourteen years ago (in a videogame).
    - We discuss ending a relationship and immediately regretting it.
    - Ben feels closer to Nobody after their recent apartment inspection.
    - Ben needs an impartial judge for his competition conundrum.
    - Ben wants to find the best way to eat spaghetti and meatballs.
    - Ben attends a cheese experience where his family puts the chef in an awkward position.
    - We discuss old people who don’t realise they’re old and people who live to work.
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    1 hr and 4 mins
  • Episode 58 - Walk The Cucumbers

    Episode 58 - Walk The Cucumbers
    Aug 19 2024
    "I guess you didn't know it, but I am a fiddle player too..."

    - Ben has a life hack for a free a margarita.
    - Ben requires arbitration on his mum’s birthday text.
    - We discuss safe words and staying clear of people with clipboards.
    - We reminisce about the lost art of squeezing a text into 160 characters.
    - Nobody proposes post-wedding ‘f you’ cards for the worst guests.
    - We discuss Nobody’s husbands boarding school experience.
    - Nobody asks what sports shouldn’t be sports?
    - We discuss Michael Phelps’ incredible medal tally and speculate wildly about how he’d kill you.
    - Nobody wants grocery packing in the Olympics and an expert flyer lane at airports.
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    1 hr and 23 mins
  • Episode 57 - Zooey Béchamel

    Episode 57 - Zooey Béchamel
    Aug 4 2024
    "F-f-f-f-f-freestyler. Rock the microphone."

    - Ben has a business idea for Zooey Deschanel.
    - Kirsty faces a kiwi conundrum.
    - We reflect on the many dead wives of Henry VIII.
    - Nobody thinks that kids these days have too much entertainment to learn pub trivia.
    - Ben is stuck waiting in the shower for the babes to show up.
    - Nobody reinvents the justice system in her dreams.
    - Nobody reflects on her idea of ‘the drug Olympics’.
    - Nobody goes on a deep dive of Ian Thorpe versus Michael Phelps.
    -Nobody is still upset that Michael Phelps didn’t actually race a shark.
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    1 hr and 17 mins
  • Episode 56 - Mamma Mia! Me Alfa Romeo!

    Episode 56 - Mamma Mia! Me Alfa Romeo!
    Jul 15 2024
    "Hot damn, hot water, hot shower"

    - Ben reviews Belle’s Spicy Chicken.
    - We revisit the concept of the best way to wear a towel after a shower.
    - We discuss crappy bathrooms, falling through the floor, Alfa Romeo accidents, door to door battery salesmen and patting strange dogs.
    - Nobody hates shower curtains and immovable screws.
    - Nobody’s latest Japanese trip makes her question her anatomy.
    - Nobody reveals the two things that reduced her husband to tears on their holiday.
    - Ben provides a dating app update as we discuss his new first date line and being offered the consolation prize of dating a friend.
    - We help a redditor who’s asking ‘where the hoes at?’
    - We discuss Where’s Wally kinks and Wally’s nemesis Odlaw.
    - Zac Efron isn’t a fan of his Spanish dub voice actor.
    - Ben’s parents watch Sophie’s Choice in German and miss the entire point of the movie.
    - Ben judges people who say they ‘read’ a book but later reveal they listened to the audiobook.
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    1 hr and 1 min
  • Episode 55 - Welcome To The Annoying Zone

    Episode 55 - Welcome To The Annoying Zone
    Jun 24 2024
    "You see, me and my homies like to play this game"

    - We debate what qualifies as ‘walking distance’ and discuss waking up the car.
    - Nobody’s dad refuses to backtrack when travelling.
    - Ben makes his annual Active Your Read Receipts Day PSA.
    - Emoji audit: Hot face and pussy emoji’s.
    - Ben provides a dating app update as he gets stuck with the bill again.
    - Nobody proposes a follow up question service after visiting the doctor.
    - Nobody’s energy provider accuses her of being confused.
    - Ben’s vegan shower gel makes him reflect on every other shower gel he’s ever used.
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    53 mins
  • Episode 54 - Number Three, Your Number Two Is Ready

    Episode 54 - Number Three, Your Number Two Is Ready
    Jun 9 2024
    "Blackpink in your area"

    - We name a dead person.
    - Ben’s new TV has kicked off an obsession with Korean television.
    - We answer Blackpink's hypothetical questions about death and zombies.
    - Nobody wants to establish some public bathroom etiquette.
    - Nobody awkwardly smiles at couples.
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    1 hr and 6 mins
  • Episode 53 - Fanta: In Space No One Can Hear You Scream

    Episode 53 - Fanta: In Space No One Can Hear You Scream
    May 21 2024
    "My Bonnie lies over the ocean, my Bonnie lies over the sea"

    - We discuss great taglines and getting heated playing board games.
    - Ben’s annoyed that overalls don’t actually go ‘over all’.
    - Nobody analyses the misheard song lyrics of My Bonnie lies over the ocean.
    - Ben visits Emporium and gets trapped in Rebel Sport.
    - Nobody has a rare but disappointing experience inhaling mouthwash.
    - Ben finds himself in a compromising scenario during an evacuation.
    - We discuss the etiquette of passing along a hello.
    - We go over our history of pet names and Ben makes a pilgrimage to Big Ben.
    - We celebrate Nobody’s amazing catch at the supermarket.
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    1 hr and 5 mins