Matt Bair and Ryan Hedrick discuss Steps 8 and 9, which focus on making amends and repairing the harm caused by addiction. They explain how to create a list of those who were hurt, the right way to make amends, and why this process is essential for recovery. Caregivers will gain insights into how these steps help rebuild relationships and support their loved ones during this crucial part of the journey.

Joining the Show:

Matt Youngblood, who has been in recovery for several years, joins the show to discuss his personal experience. On November 9, 2019, Matt was driving with his father when they were involved in a car accident. He shares the impact of the accident and how it led him to the amends process, especially in rebuilding his relationship with his mother.

Timestamps and Discussions:

21:19 - 22:18: Introduction to Matt Youngblood and the accident involving his father.

22:23 - 23:30: Matt talks about blame and his mom's reaction to his father's death.

23:38 - 25:50: Did the accident stop Matt's use of drugs and alcohol?

26:03 - 26:48: Discussion on the amends process, focusing on the "Three R's."

28:18 - 29:48: The accident resulted from years of disappointment. The amends process began when Matt entered recovery.

29:51 - 31:40: Matt breaks down the rest of the steps and how they prepared him for the amends process.

32:03 - 33:54: Matt continues to honor his recovery commitment and the people he has made amends to, introducing the concept of "living amends."

35:00: Closing thoughts.

Resources:

You can find us on X and Instagram: @sobriety_pod. Supporting Sobriety is also available on major podcast platforms like Spotify and Apple. Please like, subscribe, and rate our podcast!

Al-Anon: Al-Anon.org

AA Meetings: aa.rgroup.org/meetings

NA Meetings: virtual-na.orginte

Suicide Prevention Hotline: (800) 273-825

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Matt Bair and Ryan Hedrick explore how Steps 6 and 7 of the twelve-step recovery process can help your loved one’s journey and improve their relationship with you. Step 6 is about letting go of what holds you back, while Step 7 is seeking help to make those changes. Together, these steps focus on acceptance and humility, which are key to long-term recovery.

Timestamps and Discussions:

3:33 - 5:27
Matt explains how Steps 6 and 7 go hand-in-hand. Now is the time to stop blaming others and acknowledge your flaws.

5:28 - 7:11
Ryan talks about how addiction is like a ticking time bomb. Addicts often sabotage their success, and Ryan shares how his behavior led to setbacks in his radio career. These flaws resurface because they become a crutch.

7:46 - 10:55
The discussion dives into different types of flaws that hinder recovery. A key issue for addicts is control—whether it's over conversations, relationships, or outcomes. A higher power is vital to letting go of these control issues.

12:12 - 13:17
Flaws are obstacles, but they can be removed. Matt and Ryan discuss how, if an addict works hard, these obstacles can be turned into something positive.

13:19 - 16:30
Recovery is about practice, not perfection. Ryan reflects on his three years in recovery, noting that each year brings more self-awareness. Matt explains how flaws can make us sicker and teach us more about our disease.

18:10 - 19:32

Matt and Ryan desire more healing. They emphasize the importance of recognizing flaws and praying for their removal.

21:00 - 24:00

Closing thoughts

Resources:

You can find us on X and Instagram: @sobriety_pod. Supporting Sobriety is also available on major podcast platforms like Spotify and Apple. Please like, subscribe, and rate our podcast!

Al-Anon: Al-Anon.org

AA Meetings: aa.intergroup.org/meetings

NA Meetings: virtual-na.org

Suicide Prevention Hotline: (800) 273-825

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Matt Bair and Ryan Hedrick continue talking about the steps in their recovery journeys, sharing how the twelve steps have made a positive difference in their lives and improved their relationships with those who support them. The idea is that these steps often provide the answers to what addicts or alcoholics are struggling with. By working through the steps, we can get better with ourselves, which helps us get better with the people who love and care for us.

Step Four is about honestly examining your actions and behaviors and how they affect your life. It requires honesty and humility because it shows that you can’t do everything alone. Step Five takes this further by sharing what you’ve discovered with someone else and your higher power, admitting your flaws out loud. This helps you realize that you need support beyond just yourself.

Timestamps and Discussions:

4:24 to 6:44 - Matt discusses how these steps focus on the addict’s journey. In his Step Four, everyone he wrote about was a caregiver somehow. He explains how he uses the steps to measure what his relationships could look like.

6:44 to 8:23 - Ryan discusses a question regarding what society expects of him in the fourth step. He shares how his obsession and compulsion can still be intense, even during recovery. He also mentions that Step Four looks at his strengths, not just the negatives.

8:36 - 8:59 - Why rigorous honesty is vital to the fourth step. Getting our house in order to do this step takes willingness.

9:26 - 11:13 - The guys explain how steps four and five are related. The fourth step involves looking inward to identify past actions. After looking at himself in step four, Ryan explains that step five is about talking to someone else about what he's found.

11:14 - 14:39 - Matt says step four is about writing, and step five is about talking. Matt was so paralyzed by shame that he found his writing cathartic—step four addresses anxiety, fear, and sexual behavior.

14:56 - 17:00 - The personal inventory in the fourth step is deeply personal and loving, allowing us to see things for what they were. When we were using, we were professional victims. We used every excuse in the book to continue our behavior. Ryan talks about the therapeutic value of one addict helping each other.

17:20 - 19:25 - We can't carry shame or will use/drink again. The steps are in order for a reason. Sitting in recovery meetings and listening to people share their experiences about how they apply the steps in their lives can help your addict identify similar experiences. Pain can be a great motivator.

20:00 - 23:07 - The steps are designed to bring your addict closer to a loving higher power who can guide us in our recovery. Commitment is an often overlooked principle. Ryan talks about the fantasies he created during his drug use. Commitment to work and applying the principles in these steps is the most important thing your addict needs to do.

23:39 Closing thoughts.

Resources:

You can find us on X and Instagram: @sobriety_pod. Supporting Sobriety is also available on major podcast platforms like Spotify and Apple. Please like, subscribe, and rate our podcast!

Al-Anon: Al-Anon.org

AA Meetings: aa.intergroup.org/meetings

NA Meetings: virtual-na.org

Suicide Prevention Hotline: (800) 273-8255

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Matt Bair and Ryan Hedrick explore the first three steps of the twelve-step recovery process, which guide addicts in recognizing the problem, finding hope, and surrendering control. Despite their different journeys with addiction, both found healing through these steps.

This episode is designed to show caregivers how important the Twelve Steps are for their loved ones. Understanding these steps gives caregivers a clearer view of the recovery path, from admitting the problem to finding hope in something greater, and trusting the support system to lead their loved one toward healing. The episode highlights why these steps matter and how they can help caregivers provide better support.

Timestamps and Discussion

3:22 - 6:14

Step One: Recognizing the Illusion of Control
Ryan shares how Step One helped him realize that the control he thought he had over his addiction was just an illusion. Accepting this truth opened the door to recovery.

6:15 - 7:48

Surrender to Win
Matt explains the paradox of surrendering in Step One. While society tells us to fight for control, surrendering is a sign of growth for addicts. He highlights that honesty is key in this step.

7:45 - 11:18

Step Two: The Process of Believing
Matt talks about his experience with Step Two, explaining that "we came to believe" doesn’t happen overnight. It's a gradual process that depends on the addict’s willingness to change. This step is about starting to believe in a higher power.

11:19 - 13:30

Finding a Higher Power
Ryan discusses how to choose a higher power, emphasizing that it will become clearer as you move through the steps. He also shares some personal coincidences that made him more open to believing in something greater.

13:54 - 16:00

Step Three: Making a Decision
The third step involves making a decision to trust in something greater than oneself. Ryan and Matt discuss the importance of commitment and surrender in this step. They also explain why choosing a person as a higher power didn’t work for them and how they found other sources of belief.

21:12 - 21:53

Recap
A summary of the first three steps discussed in the episode.

22:36 - 25:40

Final Thoughts
Matt and Ryan conclude the episode with thoughts on the importance of the first three steps for both addicts and caregivers.

Resources:

You can find us on X and Instagram: @sobriety_pod. Supporting Sobriety is also available on major podcast platforms like Spotify and Apple. Please like, subscribe, and rate our podcast!

Al-Anon: Al-Anon.org

AA Meetings: aa.intergroup.org/meetings

NA Meetings: virtual-na.org

Suicide Prevention Hotline: (800) 273-8255

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Matt Bair and Ryan Hedrick have personal experience with addiction, having used different drugs and seen firsthand how addiction worsens over time. It often starts casually but becomes more severe as use continues. For caregivers, understanding the stages of addiction can help in finding the right support for their loved one. Addiction is a progressive, incurable condition that can be fatal without treatment. Matt and Ryan's recovery stories show that overcoming addiction is possible with the right help.

Addiction usually starts with trying a substance just once. Then, it moves to using it regularly. After that, risky behaviors start, which increases harm. This leads to dependence, where the person feels a strong need for the substance. In the end, addiction takes over, making substance use a central and uncontrollable part of their life.

Timestamps and Discussions:

Starting Points of Addiction 4:19 - 6:00: Matt's opioid use began with an ear infection, while Ryan started with weed.

Drugs and Peer Pressure 6:32 - 7:41: Drugs are often used to fit in during youth, and getting hooked early is common due to peer pressure.

Escalation to Regular Use 8:06 - 9:10: Matt and Ryan discuss the intensification of their use. Ryan quickly transitioned from coke to meth, a highly addictive substance.

Risks and Recklessness 10:52 - 13:04: The risky use stage is examined. Ryan describes his reckless behavior, including injecting himself and ending up homeless, while Matt talks about drinking alone and hiding his usage.

Dependence and Life Takeover 13:13 - 15:04: Matt explains how addiction dominated his life, making it impossible to function without alcohol. Ryan notes that dependence extends to all aspects of life, not just drugs and alcohol.

Physical Symptoms of Addiction 15:16 - 17:48: They discuss physical symptoms of addiction, including paranoia and anger when drugs run out, and how these signs can be recognized.

Resources:

You can find us on X and Instagram: @sobriety_pod. Supporting Sobriety is also available on major podcast platforms like Spotify and Apple. Please like, subscribe, and rate our podcast!

Al-Anon: Al-Anon.org

AA Meetings: aa.intergroup.org/meetings

NA Meetings: virtual-na.org

Suicide Prevention Hotline: (800) 273-8255

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Matt Bair and Ryan Hedrick talk about dealing with substance use in the workplace and how the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) can help your loved one get the support they need. They’re not HR experts, but both have been through similar struggles with addiction at work. Society is starting to see addiction as a disease, and more employers are showing understanding toward those who need help. This is an important conversation for people in active addiction, those in recovery, and the people who care for them.

Joining The Show:

Susan Rider is a highly experienced HR executive who specializes in consulting, employee benefits, wellness, and compliance. She is the Director of Compliance and HR Consulting at Human Capital Concepts, where she helps business leaders create strategies for long-term success.

Susan is also the incoming President of the National Association of Benefit and Insurance Professionals (NABIP), where she plays a key role in improving industry standards. She has received several awards for her work, including NAHU’s Distinguished Service Award, being named one of Insurance Business Magazine’s Hot 100 Agents, and one of the 25 Most Influential Women in Benefit Advising by Employee Benefit Advisor.

Timestamps and Discussion:

4:02 - 14:27: Introduction to Susan Rider.

14:25 - 16:23: Susan discusses how the ADA might protect your loved one's substance use at work.

16:26 - 18:48: Tips on how your loved one can discuss their addiction at work without worrying about losing their job or privacy. Leadership can help by starting these tough conversations.

19:27 - 21:15: Susan explains that while the ADA doesn’t protect drug or alcohol use at work, it does protect those who genuinely seek help.

21:37 - 23:57: The ADA also protects people with a history of addiction from job discrimination. However, some companies may still use drug or alcohol screenings that could affect employment opportunities.

25:00 - 27:07: Susan says businesses have come a long way in treating addiction as a disease. More people, including public figures, are starting to talk openly about it, helping to make these tough conversations more common.

27:22 - 29:19: There are lots of programs that offer employees hope and help. Insurance companies can provide help. Ask your local HR representative for details. Short-term disability can be an asset, and confidential programs at your job may have options for you.

Resources:

You can find us on X and Instagram: @sobriety_pod. Supporting Sobriety is also available on major podcast platforms like Spotify and Apple. Please like, subscribe, and rate our podcast!

Al-Anon: Al-Anon.org

AA Meetings: aa.intergroup.org/meetings

NA Meetings: virtual-na.org

Suicide Prevention Hotline: (800) 273-8255

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Matt Bair and Ryan Hedrick talk about how recovery is different for everyone, noting that each person has their own challenges. They discuss the difficulties of being a caregiver, especially the emotional stress it can cause. They also highlight the hard task of picking the right treatment provider for a loved one and how important this choice is for a successful recovery.

They also discuss how addiction affects the whole family, changing the dynamics and interactions at home. By sharing their own experiences, Matt and Ryan illustrate the difficulties that come with addiction and how focusing on love can help create a supportive environment for recovery.

Joining The Show:

Dr. Michael Miller, CEO and Medical Director of Miller Care Group. Dr. Miller is a board-certified general surgeon specializing in chronic wound management since 1997. He has traveled globally to provide wound care education through lectures, articles, and book chapters, and he volunteers annually in Honduras. Certified in addiction treatment since 2015, he also offers advanced pain management. Dr. Miller was named Physician of the Year in 2010 by the American Osteopathic Foundation and serves as an Assistant Professor at Marian University College of Osteopathic Medicine, where he mentors medical students.

Timestamps and discussions:

11:22 - 14:39: Introduction to Dr. Miller and discussion about limited adolescent treatment choices.

14:57 - 18:52: The effectiveness of faith-based treatment and its long-term impact on recovery.

19:04 - 22:24: Caregiver challenges, including the legal inability to restrain a loved one who is using, especially if they are young and in recovery.

22:36 - 25:35: Accountability for for-profit treatment centers. Dr. Miller discusses the need for more accountability in businesses that treat addiction.

25:50 - 28:00: Dr. Miller's final thoughts, emphasizing hope in recovery and his passion for treating young people who are addicted.

Resources:

You can find us on X and Instagram: @sobriety_pod. Supporting Sobriety is also available on major podcast platforms like Spotify and Apple. Please like, subscribe, and rate our podcast!

Al-Anon: Al-Anon.org

AA Meetings: aa.intergroup.org/meetings

NA Meetings: virtual-na.org

Suicide Prevention Hotline: (800) 273-8255

Guest Resource: https://millercaregroup.com/

Guest on Social: @the_doc_is_on_tik_tok/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Matt Bair and Ryan Hedrick discuss unrealistic expectations and how they can mess things up for caregivers and those in recovery. They share their own experiences with unrealistic expectations, like thinking relapse isn't part of recovery or that someone gets better immediately after they stop using or drinking. They also discuss the misconception that relationships improve instantly. This episode is a must-listen if you're new to recovery. Matt and Ryan know recovery is a long journey with ups and downs, so sit back and listen. We're glad you're on this journey with us.

Discussions and timestamps:

4:07 - 7:00 - The recovering addict must decide they are done using. When they surrender, amazing things happen. The caregiver can offer support, but the caregiver's loved one must make that decision.

7:02 - 8:50 - Recovery is a journey. Restoring yourself means completely tearing down the old and rebuilding anew. The "Pink Cloud" is a real experience in recovery, bringing both highs and challenges.

9:03 - 11:22 - The guys talk about past episodes on boundaries because revisiting the past can be a major obstacle for caregivers and their loved ones in recovery. If you're having a hard time with your loved one and think they should be further along, try to be patient and give them grace as they do their best.

11:26 - 13:38 - Recovery has no finish line. Some people think that if someone isn't using and goes to meetings, they are cured. Caregivers should notice positive changes in their loved one's behavior and actions if they are recovering, but they should know that they will never be fully cured. Addiction is a spiritual disease that needs ongoing care and principles.

Resources:

You can find us on X and Instagram: @sobriety_pod. Supporting Sobriety is also available on major podcast platforms like Spotify and Apple. Please like, subscribe, and rate our podcast!

Al-Anon: Al-Anon.org

AA Meetings: aa.intergroup.org/meetings

NA Meetings: virtual-na.org

Suicide Prevention Hotline: (800) 273-8255

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.