Welcome back, connected parents!

Today we’re diving into the fascinating world of the brain, specifically the Reticular Activation System (RAS). You might be wondering—what is the RAS, and why should it matter to you as a parent?

In this episode, we’ll explore how the RAS filters information and determines what we pay attention to, how it influences our reality, and more importantly unlock the secrets of this powerful brain system and learn strategies to make it a positive force in your parenting journey!

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Understanding the RAS System (00:00)
• The Role of the RAS in Daily Life (02:45)
• Impact of Limiting Beliefs on the RAS (05:43)
• Practical Tips for Improving the RAS (09:29)

Meet Jennifer Kolari



Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

In this episode of Connected Parenting, we dive into the difficult topic of putting kids in the middle of adult conflicts.

It's tempting, especially in the heat of the moment, to say things like, "Did you see what daddy just did?" or "Can you believe your mother just talked to me like that?" Even though we know this isn't the right thing to do, it's a common mistake many parents make.

We'll explore why putting kids in the middle of disagreements creates an impossible situation for them and how it can affect their emotional well-being. More importantly, we’ll discuss strategies to avoid this behavior and healthier ways to handle conflict in front of your children.

Join me as we look at how to protect your kids from being caught in the crossfire of adult disputes while fostering a more positive family dynamic.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Normalizing Conflict and Modeling Emotional Recovery (02:15)
• Examining Personal Patterns and Using the Calm Technique (06:16)
• Using Sounding Boards and Managing Anger (08:38)
• Stimulating the Insula for Emotional Regulation (14:37)
• Repairing Relationships and Teaching Emotional Resilience (18:36)

Meet Jennifer Kolari



Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

In this episode of Connected Parenting, we’re diving deep into the world of gladiator kids—those feisty, strong-willed, and intensely challenging children who push back at every turn.

These spirited kids often test the limits, leaving parents feeling exhausted, judged, and overwhelmed. Parenting a gladiator child can be incredibly tough, and it’s a journey that demands understanding, patience, and a lot of support.

Join me as I explore what makes these kids tick, the unique challenges parents face, and practical strategies for managing their behavior without losing your own calm.

Whether you’ve heard my previous episodes on gladiator kids or are tuning in for the first time, this episode will provide fresh insights and tools to help navigate the daily battles—and find more peace along the way.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by parenting a strong-willed child, you’re not alone—this episode is for you.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

Understanding Gladiator Kids (00:00)

Gladiator Kids Are Change Makers (03:48)

What Parents Are Feeling (11:09)

Gladiator Kids Will Sabotage Themselves (12:06)

The Role of Parents and Children (20:11)

Characteristics and Challenges of Gladiator Kids (20:23)

Parental Emotions and Support (20:43)

Strategies for Parenting Gladiator Kids (21:02)

Connecting with the Child and Seeking Help (21:48)

Community and Support for Parents (24:58)

Meet Jennifer Kolari



Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Whether it's tasting a new food, petting an unfamiliar dog, or watching a thrilling movie, each child faces unique challenges when it comes to taking risks.

But what if we could help them build the courage to face the new and unknown?

Imagine how those brief moments of bravery could boost their confidence and enrich their life experiences.

In this episode, we dive into the importance of strengthening this 'courage muscle' in children, especially those who are hesitant to take risks. We'll explore strategies to support them in trying new things, discovering joy, and overcoming their fears.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

Building a Child's Courage Muscle (00:00)

Starting the Conversation and Setting Small Goals (03:08)

The Role of Imagination and Visualization (04:34)

Acting It Out and Maintaining a Playful Approach (06:29)

Parental Support and Neutrality (07:26)

Creating an Accomplishment Book (09:13)

The Long-Term Nature of Parenting (10:07)

The Importance of Risk-Taking and Growth (10:57)

Resources and Support (11:39)

Meet Jennifer Kolari



Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Seeing your child start school without friends, feeling isolated and disconnected, is incredibly tough as a parent.

It’s easy to feel helpless, but there are steps you can take to empower your child and guide them through this challenging time.

Let’s explore how you can support your child, manage your own emotions, and help create a positive path forward together.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Managing Your Own Emotions When Your Child Is Socially Struggling (00:00)
• The Importance of the Calm Technique (04:25)
• Strategies for Younger Children (10:47)
• Strategies for Tweens and Teens (12:00)
• Advanced Techniques for Social Anxiety (12:16)
• Supporting the Child's Social Skills Development (17:44)
• Resources and Final Thoughts (20:26)

Meet Jennifer Kolari



Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

For many kids, anxiety kicks in weeks before school even starts.

They begin to worry about who their teacher will be, who's in their class, and if they'll be able to handle the new challenges of the upcoming grade. The transition to high school is especially overwhelming, with so many adjustments to navigate.

During this time, kids can experience a mix of emotions—excitement to see their friends but also deep nervousness about the unknown. It’s important to let them know that these feelings are normal and can happen simultaneously.

Join me today as we explore tips and strategies to help our kids navigate the the start back to school.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Back to School Transition and Big Feelings (00:00)
• The Role of Oxytocin and Cortisol (02:49)
• Establishing Routines and Rituals (04:49)
• Predicting and Preparing for Challenges (05:49)
• Handling Social Adjustments and Building Resilience (11:53)
• Connecting with Children and Building Emotional Intelligence (14:19)
• Final Tips and Resources (14:32)

Meet Jennifer Kolari



Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Ever wondered why we, as parents, sometimes resort to yelling, even when we know it's not the most effective approach?

Yelling is like an age-old parenting reflex, but let's be honest – it rarely brings out the best in our kids or us.

In this episode, I uncover the 'why' behind our shouting tendencies, the real impact it has on our little ones (hint: it's not good), and most importantly, what we can do instead.

Let's embark on a journey to discover effective, positive ways of parenting that nurture a happier, healthier family dynamic.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

Effective Communication with Children (00:00)

The Impact of Yelling on Children (05:04)

Strategies for Effective Communication (08:27)

Repairing Relationships After Conflicts (14:33)

Support and Resources for Parents (14:44)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life exampes as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

In this episode of Connected Parenting, I discuss the dynamics of the "good child" in families where a sibling—often a more challenging "gladiator child"—demands most of the parental attention.

Listen in as I explore how the "good child" may suppress their needs to avoid adding stress and share strategies from one-on-one time to using play for emotional expression in order to support these children while balancing family dynamics.

Visit connectedparenting.com for more resources, and thank you for tuning in!

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Coping mechanisms in families with difficult children (00:00)
• Managing emotions & needs in a family with uneven dynamics (03:42)
• Parenting strategies for a "super coping" child (08:25)
• Managing two children with different emotional needs (12:03)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).