Showing titles in Literature & Fiction

Going back home was not exactly what Tim and the C&C gang expected. Trouble continues to follow them back to Gulf Coast Mississippi. Trouble...and a gnome...and an undead midget.

When horror writer Nick Steen gets sucked into a cursed typewriter by the terrifying Type-Face, Dark Lord of the Prolix, the hellish visions inside his head are unleashed for real. Forced to fight his escaping imagination - now leaking out of his own brain - Nick must defend the town of Stalkford from his own fictional horrors, including avascular-necrosis-obsessed serial killer Nelson Strain and Nick's dreaded throppleganger, the Dark Third.

At 24, Clarinda James has lived a traumatic life. One of the last images she saw before losing her sight was that of her parents' death. The nightmares of that time still haunt her every night. Taken in at 19 by her sister, Clary didn't know there was going to be a price to pay, a price far greater than her blindness. It's not until Blue walks into her life, she realizes it's possible to experience the joy of warmth. In her darkness, Blue will become her beacon, her guide.

If we were as tiny as ants to another being, what would they make of our philosophies? The great satirist Voltaire imagines alien visitors who have opinions. Bedtime stories are narrated by the world's most celebrated voices and written with no beginning, middle, or end so you don't stay up to hear what happens next. They're interesting enough to give your mind something to focus on, but delivered in a way that encourages sleep.

When Tubby informs his fiancee that her new hat makes her look like a Pekingese, she is naturally incensed. But it is when he questions the validity of the story of her narrow escape from a beastly, hungry shark that the engagement is firmly called off. But love is in the air for Gussie Fink-Nottle. He abandons his beloved newts to court the new object of his affections, the dreamy and romantic Miss Madeline Bassett. He is dressed as Mephistopheles...and it appears that even the Devil can rely on Jeeves.

Twelve early stories from the comic master, including the romantic truth behind the odd success of a Soho restaurant; the mysterious ways of a lucky black cat; a tale of three exiled baseball fans; a private detective in love with an actress in a touring company; a policeman in love with a parlor maid in the Battersea Park Road; Mr. Henry Wallace Mills of the two left feet; and the first appearance of Bertie Wooster and Jeeves, as Bertie is sent to New York to rescue his cousin from the clutches of a Vaudeville starlet...

Choose us. Choose life. Choose mortgage payments; choose washing machines; choose cars; choose sitting oan a couch watching mind-numbing and spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing f****n junk food intae yir mooth. Choose rotting away, pishing and shiteing yersel in a home, a total f***n embarrassment tae the selfish, f****d-up brats ye've produced. Choose life.

Reginald Iolanthe Perrin, the creation of comedy genius David Nobbs, is surely one of the best-loved comedy heroes of our time - in both literature and television. So it is with great pride that Audible presents Reggie's escapades in digital audio for the very first time: we invite you to join him, and the memorable supporting characters who help him along the way, on one man's quest to avoid an everyday existence.

Starting life on BBC TV, Whack-O! transferred to radio in 1961 and ran for three series on the Light Programme until 1963. Collected here are those rediscovered episodes, featuring scholastic scheming and academic anarchy at Chiselbury School. An old-established seat of learning for the ‘sons of gentlefolk’, Chiselbury is presided over by whack-happy Headmaster Professor James Edwards, who runs rings around his fellow masters and never misses a trick when it comes to exploiting the pupils and their parents.

Molly Baker is living her best life. Thirty-eight years old, she lives on the 25-acre Hope Farm in Buckinghamshire, surrounded by (mostly) four-legged friends and rolling hills. An ex-teacher, Molly runs the farm as an alternative education for kids who have special needs or behavioural issues. It's full on, but she wouldn't have it any other way. So when the well-groomed Shelby Dacre turns up at Hope Farm asking to enrol his son Lucas, Molly isn't fazed. But Lucas is distant, and soon Molly realises he might be more of a handful than she anticipated.

Listen and learn! The Sound of General Ignorance brings you all the best bits of the number one bestseller The Book of General Ignorance in handy audio form. Allow yourself to wallow in the misconceptions, mistakes and misunderstandings in 'common knowledge'. Your newfound wisdom will help you to impress your friends, frustrate your enemies and win every argument.

When philandering Sir Giles Lynchwood decides it's time to wriggle free of his monumentally unattractive wife, Lady Maud, he knows divorce is out of the question. He can't leave her and keep her cash; a reversionary clause on her ancestral home, Handyman Hall, has taken care of that. Lady Maud, for her own special reasons, is also dying to see the back of Sir Giles.

There's a new chat in town as the hit programme comes live from the BBC Television Centre, and Alan ushers on a variety of guests including horsewoman of few words Sue Lewis, powerful hypnotist Tony le Mesmer, fashion designer Yvonne Boyd, and husband and wife thespians Tania Barker and Gary Barker. There's also a whole edition of the programme broadcast from sexy Paris, city of French people.

Why Mummy Swears is the much anticipated new novel from Gill Sims, author of the hilarious Why Mummy Drinks and online sensation Peter and Jane. It’s every parents’ nightmare - the start of the school holidays - and instead of sitting in the sun, reading a book over a cold, crisp glass of Pinot Grigio, Mummy has two bored moppets to attend to. After frantically booking sports camps, child minder slots, not to mention time off work, Mummy is exhausted. But this is only the beginning....

Gabriel Delling might call himself a professional con artist, but when walking superstitions start trying to bite his face off, his charm is shockingly unhelpful. It turns out living nightmares almost never appreciate a good joke. Together with a succubus who insists on constantly saving his life, Gabe desperately tries to survive a new reality that suddenly features demons, legends, and a giant locust named Dale - all of whom pretty much hate his guts. And when an ancient horror comes hunting for a spirit locked in his head, Gabe finds himself faced with the excruciating choice between death...or becoming some kind of freaking hero.

Well-meaning do-gooder Clare Barker is back, and dealing with more office politics, troublesome clients and domestic dramas. Secretly regarding herself as a cross between Mother Theresa and Wonder Woman, she's got all the right jargon for every problem, but never any practical solutions. However, in today's 'Big Society' there are plenty of challenges out there for an involved, caring social worker (or even Clare). These six series find her struggling once again to control both her professional and private life.

This is a collection of six short stories from the Caverns and Creatures series. It includes the following stories: "Slimes and Misty Wieners", "Great Balls on Fire", "Your Anus Is a Gas Giant", "Clear and Present Ranger", "The Mimic's Chest", and "Styxian Stoners May Break My Boners".

Flora is forced to move back to the tiny island of Mure from the bright lights of London. It's tough: even the beautiful landscapes and bright blue sea can't lift her spirits - she's too busy looking after her dad and her feckless brothers. Then she chances upon her mum's collection of recipes and begins to cook her way through it. As she reconnects with her family and the place she was born, might she also find herself?

Max Jennings is in a bad mood. The secrets from her past make it her natural state of being. Max’s bad mood means that very few people actually truly understand her or know that her dream is to be a pastry chef. When a rare opportunity to work for world-famous Avis Phillips presents itself, Max jumps at the chance. Avis and her staff aren’t stingy with the tough love, so Max spends every spare minute practicing her craft.

Everybody down! Prepare for more navigational blunders and maritime misadventures as radio's favourite frigate puts to sea once more. Collected here are the complete Series Twelve and Thirteen of the much loved show - including the 200th episode, 'Sir Willoughby at Shanghai', in which Troutbridge takes the Governor and his wife on a trip to China - only to find itself under attack... Plus, Lieutenant-Commander Murray and his wife Rita celebrate their first anniversary and move out to married quarters.